(NEWSER) – Opted not to sit through 210 minutes of Grammy action? No worries. Here's your cheatsheet to seven people, moments, and sartorial choices worth knowing about!
1. Taylor Swift didn't win, but she maybe thought she did. Her Red was up for Album of the Year, and as they named the winner—not Red, but the also-starts-with-R-Random Access Memories from Daft Punk—she momentarily appeared to have that "I won" look on her face, reports Fox News.
2. More than 30 couples got married on-air, and the weddings seem to be legal. Queen Latifah officiated over the same-sex and straight marriages, and the New York Times has this: Latifah "was recently deputized by Los Angeles County to perform the weddings and will sign the marriage certificates for each couple."
3. Katy Perry wore four dresses, and most of them were weird. One was a Valentino gown featuring a billowy skirt covered in musical notes; another placed a sort of crucifix across her chest (that was what she wore when she got burned at the stake).
4. But Pharrell Williams' weird hat stole the show. Today reports that the "towering chapeau" is a Vivienne Westwood from the early '80s. What it was compared to on Twitter: Smokey the Bear's hat, something out of Harry Potter, and the Seinfeld "urban sombrero." And, yes, the hat already has its own Twitter account. (Runner-up fashion accessory: Madonna's grill.)
5. Everyone thought Ozzy Osbourne was possibly wasted. Because he totally flubbed his introduction of Ringo Starr, with basically no one able to understand him (even his bandmates were laughing). He later admitted to screwing it up, but when asked what he meant to say, "his answer was yet again incoherent," reports the Los Angeles Daily News.
6. If you missed the Grammys, you didn't miss Miley, but you did miss Beyonce. Miley's "Wrecking Ball" wasn't nominated, and she apparently "had no place" in the show, reports Today. No worries: Beyonce took the scandalous crown from Miley with her risque performance of "Drunk In Love" which she performed in a thong bodysuit that gave hubby Jay-Z the chance to pat her derriere.
7. Show producers will ship a piano a pretty long distance if you're famous enough. Paul McCartney played a piano that usually sits in his London music room ... and has been used by him (and, briefly, Ringo) since 1967, when it was painted with a psychedelic design.